Am I excited about this album?
Yes!..BUT.....
As a Christian I've been wrestling with how open I'm being about my struggles with depression, insecurities and my vices. I've seen artists get accused of "not being a real Christian" because of their openness about those particular areas. The phrase these people use is usually along the lines of "If you have Jesus, you can't be depressed" and that's SO FAR from the truth!
Ask anyone that knows me, I'm an EXTREMELY private person and I guard my peace with everything I got. So being vulnerable with a bunch of strangers on the internet isn't only different for me...it's scary and anxiety inducing. The internet is NOT a safe place, the trolls have proven that.
Another obstacle I keep hitting is the question, "what am I saying?" I know what this album stands for in my lifge and what it means to me and that's what makes me want to take this leap into the lions den but...What message am I trying to convey to you, the listener? There's so many different answers I have but the underlying meaning of "Dancing with Death" is...
There's times when the promises from God, even God himself, seem so far that there's no point in even trying. Even when you're trying you get these moments that make it feel like you're doing everything in vain to the point that you ask yourself "why am I even alive?"/ Other times the allure of sin (death) is so strong that you don't even care about missing out on the blessing because of how these things make you feel in the moment.
But then there's also times you remember who you are and whose you are, you remember your Savior that died on the cross to pay for the sins you ran to before, you remember that there's power in the name of Jesus and you feel like NOTHING can stop you.
Then you have another season where you forget again. It's a constant back and forth, like a dance...When couples dance, one leads ant the other follows. Toes start getting stepped on and the dance goes bad when the follower tries to lead. Just like how life gets harder when we stop trying to follow God and decide to lead ourselves.
It's a roller coaster ride of emotions and that's what you can expect from this album. This isn't an album exclusively for Christians. It's for anyone that's' ever been broken, hopeless and fearful and found, is finding or wants to find a way to overcome those things. Yes, I talk about God A LOT, but I know you'll still be able to connect with my story and find peace in knowing you're not alone. I reopened some of my wounds, stitched up some new ones, stepped on the devils neck, punched him in the face and praised the most high God almighty while making this album.
If you made it this far I want to invite you on the journey of getting this album completed and in your hands. I can tell you now, I'm gonna need some help. Idk what songs I want to use as singles, I have some ideas for artwork but no solid mockups....I'm still in the baby stages. Your ideas, opinions and skills will be greatly appreciated. This invite doesn't end with the album; I'm hoping to cultivate a safe, judgement free community where we can be ourselves, share our shortcomings and help each other overcome all of our obstacles. Hit the link below to join me & the crew as we get through this Dance with Death.
-sytE
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